Curtis Dahlgren
Snowflake U; The Academaniac and the lady on the MTA
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By Curtis Dahlgren
February 16, 2019

DID SHE EVER COME BACK? DID SHE EVER GET OFF?

Two women got on the metro transit at different stops but ended up sitting side by side. One was a traditionalist and one was a progressive. The former tried to have a friendly conversation, much to the latter's consternation.

"I see you're taking work home," said the traditionalist. "What do you do?"

"I'm a professor at Hahvahd," said the progressive, with a certain tilt to her nose.

"Oh, interesting," said the other. "What do you teach?" And the professor says:

"Basically, I teach kids to hate their forefathers, minorities to hate white people, women to hate men, and gays to hate Christians."

"WHY?" asked the other, wide-eyed, and the professor says:

"For the sake of tolerance, of course. We want America to be more like Europe and Cuber. Besides, it pays well, and the kids get college credits for it."

Trying a new tack, the traditionalist said, "The news is just terrible, isn't it? What did you think about all those people getting shot at the University of Texas?"

"I never watch the news," said the professor. "It just takes time away from watching movies and stuff."

"Well," said the other, "I don't watch either. We got rid of our TV, thankfully. But we follow the world crisis on the radio."

"Crisis you say?" says the professor.

"How can you possibly not know there are crises in the world situation?" asks the other.

"Well I've been out of town," says the professor. The lady sighs and says:

"They say the six o'clock news is beginning to look like the Twilight Zone. Even Paul Harvey sounds discouraged lately. And if you want to know what I think, I think the world's coming to an end."

"What difference does it make?" says the professor. "WE live in Bahston." And the lady says:

"You'll have to excuse me. I think this is where I get off."

Under her breath, the professor mutters, "I thought she'd never get off."

Yes, but did the feminist professor ever get off? No, she never got off, 'neath the streets of Boston.

P.S. Based on the old folk song, that's an adaptation of a short story I was working on in 1968, another time of division and distress in America. There had been a shooting at the University of Texas, and news from Vietnam was not good at all. I wanted to be a writer even back then, but I was kind of busy, and I guess I needed time to "mature" over the last 50 years. I developed my interest in writing by reading columns in a Rockford, Illinois newspaper, including some by Betty Carlson, a cousin of mine. On December 31, 1967 William K. Todd, publisher and editor of the Morning Star, printed the following editorial on page one:

"Many an American citizen will have a monumental headache Monday from too much New Year's happy tonight. But the merry-making during this holiday season seems to have been marred with distraction. Laughter seemed put on – not really fun-filled. Folks seemed to be different. They seemed to be troubled. It's one man's opinion – but it's apparent – the average American citizen – regardless of ethnic group – is scared. And there's reason to be scared."

FALSE DOOM-AND-GLOOM? OR JUST AHEAD OF HIS TIME?

PPS: Seriously, traditional moms are worried greatly about the world into which their sons are going, a world of so-called "strong women" who are strong enough to cuss like a drunken sailor but are afraid of childbirth. It's a world in which a man's own offspring can be legally killed against his will (the woman legally blonde or otherwise). It's also a world in which the war on boys has actually lowered testosterone levels and produced men with weak-fishy hand shakes. FORBES magazine, May 2012, published an article, "Generation of Sissies":

"Members of this generation have been the victims of being coddled, babied, pampered, misled, misguided, and under-educated so badly that their 'take care of me' upbringing cannot be sustained . . as spoiled, soft post-adolescents." – quoted by Beyond Today magazine, July-August 2018 ("The Decline of the American Male")

Thanks in part to highly paid "feminist" professors in Academania, I must add.

© Curtis Dahlgren

 

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Curtis Dahlgren

Curtis Dahlgren is semi-retired in southern Wisconsin, and is the author of "Massey-Harris 101." His career has had some rough similarities to one of his favorite writers, Ferrar Fenton... (more)

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