Frank Maguire
Filleting Los Soles
By Frank Maguire
Last night — May 6 — was a nightmare for me, I was so bloody angry at the stupidity, ingratitude, and arrogance of the Suns management and players, and furious at that officious QUANGO (Quasi Non-Government Organization) that goes by the acronym NBA and indulges in the now out-of-control Politics of Sports.
I had started an article, yesterday, hoping to exculpate the Suns and blame a few politicized jerks, like Canadian citizen Steve Nash, the "Greenie-Beanie Weenie" alien from Vancouver, B.C.
I called the Suns p.r. office, where "Jeannie," I think it was, had left a phone message saying that she was "not in the office, presently, but would absolutely, most definitely, without question call back if one would leave a phone number." I said "I'm a writer for an Oregon paper and would just like to ask a couple of questions." Guess what! Jeannie absolutely, most definitely did not call me back — leaving me without answer.
After some of checking, I found out, to my chagrin, that the floundering Los Soles are institutional, incapably-culpable, bottom-feeders. Reality is that the Sun Deity of Paradise Valley, Robert Sarver, another canker-banker (and, on the Board of the NBA), and his U. of A. pantheon-partner, Steve "The Ginger Headed" Kerr, are as disingenuous as the abysmal nether realm. They moralize, in the typically Tucsonista, Left-Lib fashion, and they are primarily concerned with their own finances. How does one say "It's the economy stupid" in Spanish? "Es el economia, estupido"? My Hispanic wife took a shot at it. It's close enough.
Most amazingly, these turkeys, looking out for their own giblets, don't appear to have a clue as to what they have, ultimately, accomplished. Legal Arizonans who overwhelmingly support SB-1070 will teach these legally-deficient Pecksniffian busybodies a real lesson in basic economics.
Today's Washington Times editorial "Amnesty for illegal Phoenix Suns fans" is good, and it is almost exactly how I determined I would proceed in my article. But, I am MUCH too angry to do a "Come, let us reason together" nice-guy song and soft-shoe. I am in full attack — "damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead" — mode. My end product will be more passionate and less compassionate than the Times editorial: I absolutely, most definitely, without question hope.
Oh, I almost forgot. If the "seem to be everywhere like stink on a skunk," pot-stirring, racialist, fund-raising, REV'RENDS Jesse "The Gerbil" Jerksong and Al "Wookie" Sharptongue dare to show their profiles 'cross our Arizona borders again, they will find out about the Arizona expression, "Pilgrims, this State isn't big enough fo' both of us. So, amoebos, just y'all vamoose, and ply your polecat trade elsewhere."
© Frank Maguire
May 7, 2010
Last night — May 6 — was a nightmare for me, I was so bloody angry at the stupidity, ingratitude, and arrogance of the Suns management and players, and furious at that officious QUANGO (Quasi Non-Government Organization) that goes by the acronym NBA and indulges in the now out-of-control Politics of Sports.
I had started an article, yesterday, hoping to exculpate the Suns and blame a few politicized jerks, like Canadian citizen Steve Nash, the "Greenie-Beanie Weenie" alien from Vancouver, B.C.
I called the Suns p.r. office, where "Jeannie," I think it was, had left a phone message saying that she was "not in the office, presently, but would absolutely, most definitely, without question call back if one would leave a phone number." I said "I'm a writer for an Oregon paper and would just like to ask a couple of questions." Guess what! Jeannie absolutely, most definitely did not call me back — leaving me without answer.
After some of checking, I found out, to my chagrin, that the floundering Los Soles are institutional, incapably-culpable, bottom-feeders. Reality is that the Sun Deity of Paradise Valley, Robert Sarver, another canker-banker (and, on the Board of the NBA), and his U. of A. pantheon-partner, Steve "The Ginger Headed" Kerr, are as disingenuous as the abysmal nether realm. They moralize, in the typically Tucsonista, Left-Lib fashion, and they are primarily concerned with their own finances. How does one say "It's the economy stupid" in Spanish? "Es el economia, estupido"? My Hispanic wife took a shot at it. It's close enough.
Most amazingly, these turkeys, looking out for their own giblets, don't appear to have a clue as to what they have, ultimately, accomplished. Legal Arizonans who overwhelmingly support SB-1070 will teach these legally-deficient Pecksniffian busybodies a real lesson in basic economics.
Today's Washington Times editorial "Amnesty for illegal Phoenix Suns fans" is good, and it is almost exactly how I determined I would proceed in my article. But, I am MUCH too angry to do a "Come, let us reason together" nice-guy song and soft-shoe. I am in full attack — "damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead" — mode. My end product will be more passionate and less compassionate than the Times editorial: I absolutely, most definitely, without question hope.
Oh, I almost forgot. If the "seem to be everywhere like stink on a skunk," pot-stirring, racialist, fund-raising, REV'RENDS Jesse "The Gerbil" Jerksong and Al "Wookie" Sharptongue dare to show their profiles 'cross our Arizona borders again, they will find out about the Arizona expression, "Pilgrims, this State isn't big enough fo' both of us. So, amoebos, just y'all vamoose, and ply your polecat trade elsewhere."
© Frank Maguire
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