Michael Victory
Griffin L. Hamm showed me joy
By Michael Victory
Over the past few weeks the western suburbs of Philadelphia got hit with 24 inches of snow in just a few days. I spent a lot of time shoveling and had much time to think. At the same time the snow was falling, my good friends' two-year-old son, Griffin became very ill and was hospitalized with brain damage. He was in a drug-induced comma for days as his parents waited for the swelling on his brain to decrease. I anxiously thought about him and his parents each day and night. I hoped and prayed for Griffin and his family.
As the father of a two-year-old, I was terrified. I could not imagine what my friends were going though as they waited for a sign from Griffin. Just weeks before, Griffin celebrated his second birthday. Days prior, he played in the snow and built a snowman. What was happening? I ached for a phone call with hopeful news. Although I never lost hope, I did not get that call. Griffin Lee Hamm died on January 29, 2011.
During this time I was reading a book by Robert Greenleaf titled, Servant leadership: A journey into the nature of legitimate power and greatness. I did not read much of the book before I was moved. Greenleaf (2002), suggests characteristic of a good leader is hope. I agree with Greenleaf and also consider hope a fundamental characteristic of human reason.
In my opinion what has happened to Griffin's parents has changed their lives forever, they will likely never see life the same way, and will never be the same people. I am confident god will give them the strengths they will need to get through the trying times that lie ahead. Greenleaf (2002) describes hope as absolutely essential to both sanity and wholeness of life. I have faith Griffin's parents will never abandon hope.
I wish for a day when my friends will be able to again experience good moments, even happy and beautiful moments, and it will not seem impossible or wrong to smile or laugh. Instead it will seem right and beautiful and a fitting way to honor and remember their son. As Moffat (1992) writes, there can come a day when grieving parents may come to be "surprised by joy."
I will never forget the joyful memories I have of Griffin, as he pushed his truck across the deck on a sunny day, as we sat and watched and talked and laughed. Or the stories I would hear about how Griffin would sneak up behind his father, only to give him a smack on his big bald head. These memories I have are precious gifts, they give me joy and I will keep them in my heart forever.
All of my love to my very good friends, the family of Griffin Lee Hamm.
December 21, 2008 — January 29, 2011
Moffat, M.J. (Ed.) In the midst of winter: Selections from the literature of mourning. New York: Random House. 1992.
Greenleaf, R. K., Spears, L. C., & Stephen, R. (2002). Servant leadership: A journey into the nature of legitimate power and greatness 25th anniversary edition. Indianapolis, IN: The Robert K. Greenleaf Center.
© Michael Victory
February 15, 2011
Over the past few weeks the western suburbs of Philadelphia got hit with 24 inches of snow in just a few days. I spent a lot of time shoveling and had much time to think. At the same time the snow was falling, my good friends' two-year-old son, Griffin became very ill and was hospitalized with brain damage. He was in a drug-induced comma for days as his parents waited for the swelling on his brain to decrease. I anxiously thought about him and his parents each day and night. I hoped and prayed for Griffin and his family.
As the father of a two-year-old, I was terrified. I could not imagine what my friends were going though as they waited for a sign from Griffin. Just weeks before, Griffin celebrated his second birthday. Days prior, he played in the snow and built a snowman. What was happening? I ached for a phone call with hopeful news. Although I never lost hope, I did not get that call. Griffin Lee Hamm died on January 29, 2011.During this time I was reading a book by Robert Greenleaf titled, Servant leadership: A journey into the nature of legitimate power and greatness. I did not read much of the book before I was moved. Greenleaf (2002), suggests characteristic of a good leader is hope. I agree with Greenleaf and also consider hope a fundamental characteristic of human reason.
In my opinion what has happened to Griffin's parents has changed their lives forever, they will likely never see life the same way, and will never be the same people. I am confident god will give them the strengths they will need to get through the trying times that lie ahead. Greenleaf (2002) describes hope as absolutely essential to both sanity and wholeness of life. I have faith Griffin's parents will never abandon hope.
I wish for a day when my friends will be able to again experience good moments, even happy and beautiful moments, and it will not seem impossible or wrong to smile or laugh. Instead it will seem right and beautiful and a fitting way to honor and remember their son. As Moffat (1992) writes, there can come a day when grieving parents may come to be "surprised by joy."
I will never forget the joyful memories I have of Griffin, as he pushed his truck across the deck on a sunny day, as we sat and watched and talked and laughed. Or the stories I would hear about how Griffin would sneak up behind his father, only to give him a smack on his big bald head. These memories I have are precious gifts, they give me joy and I will keep them in my heart forever.
All of my love to my very good friends, the family of Griffin Lee Hamm.
December 21, 2008 — January 29, 2011
Moffat, M.J. (Ed.) In the midst of winter: Selections from the literature of mourning. New York: Random House. 1992.
Greenleaf, R. K., Spears, L. C., & Stephen, R. (2002). Servant leadership: A journey into the nature of legitimate power and greatness 25th anniversary edition. Indianapolis, IN: The Robert K. Greenleaf Center.
© Michael Victory
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