Curtis Dahlgren
PC Jumps the Shark: the commencement address you should have heard
By Curtis Dahlgren
May 9, 2023

"Common sense is a flower that doesn't grow in every garden." –

GRADUATES, OUTWARD BOUND, AND SNOWFLAKES: I come not to praise you. I come to remind you of people who went before you, people your professors have been slandering for your last four to six years. I come with the realities of current events. For example, right here, thank God for those caps and gowns; without them we wouldn't have much pomp and circumstance today. I know what some of you are wearing under those gowns and it "ain't pretty"!

Now I know that you have been told since four-year-old kindergarten that you are the smartest, the most highly educated, the most highly evolved, generation that has ever lived. And that modern mores and modern fashions are part of that "evolution." You figure that we old fogies will soon die off, leaving a more "tolerant" and cool culture. What a crock!

As for the people who went before you, and before me, America was settled by people who weren't "popular." The pilgrims and Puritans didn't "fit in" in Europe, the Old World. They risked their lives and left behind their loved ones to try to start a New World right. They weren't just snowflakes "blowin' in the wind." They got to their destination (that word has something to do with destiny).

After the pilgrims and puritans came the pioneers. They crossed the Appalachian Trail to the west. The sons of the pioneers climbed the Rockies and the Sierras. Some of them didn't make it, and they didn't die of "natural causes." But some of them made it all the way to Alaska. Their conscience was their compass. They weren't twiddling their thumbs on a smart phone or watching Dancing With the Stars. Their reality show really was "survival." They didn't have psychiatrists or "safe spaces." But this country they founded and built with blood, sweat, and tears has lost its moral compass.

Some of you don't even know what the word "morality" means. It's that thing your professors have been ridiculing. It's that thing that's not HIP. It's not politically correct, which is itself a verboten term on this campus. This institution used to brag about its "winnowing and sifting." No longer.

Most of you don't even know what "sifting" is because you've never watched a threshing machine or combine work. Not only do you not appreciate the engineering that went into those machines, but you might be "offended" by what they do; they separate the wheat from the chaff. There was nothing "subjective" about winnowing, unlike today's "soft sciences" and junk science. And the heaviest heads were the ones that bowed their heads. Yes, I'm referring to religion here.

Still waters run deep, but today the wheel that squeaks the loudest gets all the grease, gets the media attention. The lowest common denominator wins. That's the very definition of political correctness.

George Patton stated correctly that if everybody is thinking alike, someone isn't thinking. These days, if someone disagrees with you, and YOU have taken a course in sociology or something, you say they are harassing you! If someone says something "annoying" to you, you have to run off to a "safe place" at your helicopter-Alma-Mater for counseling? YOU CALL THAT THE SURVIVAL OF THE "FITTEST"? You call that evolution? What a CROCK.

The only thing "higher" about Higher Education today is the COST. MarquetteWarriors coach Al McGuire said he thought everyone should go to college and get a degree and then spend six months as a cab driver and six months as a bartender. It was a brilliant prediction:

Half of you kids could end up tending bar or driving for Uber this year, the way the economy is going.

BY THE WAY – 90 percent of Native Americans aren't "offended" by the term Washington Redskins, so why did Marquette eliminate the name Warriors (which has nothing to do with race)? Answer: political correctness is the New Religion. And this hyper religion, this super sensitivity, now says that girls should NOT be offended if they see a male/other in their bathroom or locker room. The 999 should not be offended because he/she/it WOULD be offended if not admitted.

The 999 have to be "okay" with feeling uncomfortable, because otherwise the one-half of one would feel uncomfortable going to the bathroom they've been going to all their lives – the biological/anatomical bathroom? My pen name is R.U. Kiddingme and political correctness is the reason.

I can't say I've never been in a women's bathroom, but can say "never on purpose." A week or so ago, I was at a fast food store. At McDonald's you have to make a left turn for the men's room; at others you have to make a right turn. I made the wrong turn. I didn't see a urinal, and when a lady came out of the stall, the wrong turn was confirmed. I said, "OOPS, I'm not even a liberal" and made a hasty retreat, avoiding eye contact. It was either a senior moment or it was writer's block (and voila, I had some material for this speech).

But seriously, boys and girls, let's get serious! The whole world is falling apart and all the media can talk about is women suing Trump. The news media aren't really into news anymore; they're just encouraging protests and lawlessness.

Human life? A school bus driver in Charlotte swerved to avoid a cat in the road and drove down an embankment and hit a house, sending 14 kids to the hospital. Really? During the month of May, 56 human beings were murdered in one city alone, Chicago, and no one is protesting that! People are protesting the police department, which is trying to save black lives! What is wrong with this picture?

Answer: political correctness. Which means no longer winnowing or sifting for the truth – because on this campus, there is no such thing as Truth with a capital T (only "conventional wisdom" or "consensus" – the party line).

Which brings me to the subject of junk science. Don't get me started, but first they said milk, butter, and eggs would kill you; now they say "never mind" that. First they said fats and salt will kill you; now they tell us "never mind." And now we come to the next BIG scare:

"One recent study found that the average global temperature would rise another 3.2 degrees F by the end of the century even if humans carbon emissions dropped to zero tomorrow . . . By 2100, sea levels would rise by as much as six feet, leaving hundreds of millions of the world's coast-dwellers homeless .. [and] if change becomes self-sustaining, our children and grandchildren will inherit an atmosphere irreversibly out of control . . [with] half of Earth's currently occupied land uninhabitable by 2300 . . . If several of the world's land-based ice sheets melt, we could see a 40-foot rise in sea levels within centuries."Popular Science (July 2012)

No hyperbole there, eh? Just "science"? What a crock! The same guy wouldn't have been able to tell you a week ago whether it was going to rain or shine today. AND – does he realize how big the "seas" are compared to the land area on earth? How many gallons of water would it take to raise the sea level one inch? This guy is just a free-lance writer, neither a mathematician nor a "paleoclimatologist" (as some eggheads prefer to be called).

And I'm a flat-earther if I ask some "dumb questions"? For example, does he realize that for every inch the ocean would rise, it would take even more water to make it rise the next inch (due to the round earth)?

IN CONCLUSION, you graduates have bigger issues to worry about than the year 2060 or 2100 (like World War III or how you're going to get out of your parents' house and get a job). No one who has really really wanted a job couldn't find one, so get one!

[This is a re-posting of my June 5, 2016 column, the year people said enough is enough and voted Hillary down. Pass it on, if you will.]

© Curtis Dahlgren


The views expressed by RenewAmerica columnists are their own and do not necessarily reflect the position of RenewAmerica or its affiliates.
(See RenewAmerica's publishing standards.)

Click to enlarge

Curtis Dahlgren

Curtis Dahlgren is semi-retired in southern Wisconsin, and is the author of "Massey-Harris 101." His career has had some rough similarities to one of his favorite writers, Ferrar Fenton... (more)


Receive future articles by Curtis Dahlgren: Click here

More by this author


Stephen Stone
The most egregious lies Evan McMullin and the media have told about Sen. Mike Lee

Siena Hoefling
Protect the Children: Update with VIDEO

Stephen Stone
Flashback: Dems' fake claim that Trump and Utah congressional hopeful Burgess Owens want 'renewed nuclear testing' blows up when examined

Cliff Kincaid
Making Russia great again

Pete Riehm
Is Joe Biden being slowly thrown overboard?

Curtis Dahlgren
The real Tom Jefferson

Tom DeWeese
Fighting back at the local level

Cherie Zaslawsky
The Malone controversy: Part one

Steve A. Stone
What does the 'common sense' man want?

Rev. Mark H. Creech
Revelation Chapter 17: Babylon revealed – A warning for today

Linda Kimball
Psalm 50: 21-22: Holy God to the depraved: NOW do you see the stupidity, depravity, and evil in your hearts?

Peter Lemiska
The real threat to our Democracy

Jerry Newcombe
And lead us not into temptation

Tom DeWeese
Cancel Culture using the pseudo-ailment 'eco-anxiety' to cure the non-existence of manmade global warming/climate change

Pete Riehm
Finally, a Republican with backbone
  More columns


Click for full cartoon
More cartoons


Matt C. Abbott
Chris Adamo
Russ J. Alan
Bonnie Alba
Chuck Baldwin
Kevin J. Banet
J. Matt Barber
Fr. Tom Bartolomeo
. . .
[See more]

Sister sites