Frank Maguire
Fear of flying the frenzied skies
By Frank Maguire
May 12, 2011

I spent some time looking through a list of psychopathologies and found a few that marginally apply, but nothing totally definitive. I'll have to propose a neologism for what is going-on in America's once friendly skies. I'll call is Frenzyphobia!

In the past couple of weeks, we have had a number of nationals from Arab countries emulating the ancient Scandinavian warriors known as the "berserkers." These Nordic-Viking types are said to have been "frenzied in battle," and considered themselves to be "invulnerable. They were rewarded by the Valkyrie1 with a permanent vacation in paradisiacal Valhalla.

All of you know about the Islamic Holy Warrior jihadists (Jihad: holy war undertaken by Muslims against those who do not believe in Islam), and how their Semitic (Arabs are Semites, being descendants of Shem, Noah's eldest son and progenitor of the Semitic peoples) kamikaze operates.

Now, the Berserkers were honest about the whole thing. Though they fought fearlessly, even to their death, they didn't call themselves "suicide warriors" in an effort to deny that they were very determined and efficient killers of other persons.

The Kamikaze (which is a Shinto religious term meaning "divine wind') regarded their emperor Hirohito to be The Sun God, and they were considered "little sun gods." Though they were called "suicide bombers," and received extra heavenly perqs for killing the enemy with the almost certain likelihood that they would fragmented into little-sun-god fragments by the impact, they also were not ashamed of the proud title of "killers of the enemy." Homicide was their goal, and self-homicide was their end.

Back to the Frenzied Skies!

Americans choosing to fly in commercial airplanes have, over the past year-plus, been victims of a type of profiling I choose to call "genital profiling." Our politicoes (rhymes with "potatoes") pusillanimity of will has kept them from paying reasonable attention to those who look the most like possible terrorists (mostly Arabs, mostly?) and engaging in prudent profiling. Such a judicious practice would have annoyed the "but it ain't would you like it?" MSNBC types. The politically-correct, lily-livered timorousness of our government has made airline travel for millions of American citizens a chaotic pain in the glutes.

Though I don't suggest that the "Profile your genitalia" stupidity — Homeland Security didn't need their help — was a Jihadist idea, it certainly kicked the American economy in its private sector. It is costly. This made jihadists and their press-gangs happy — watching the U.S.A. engage in attempted economic suicide out of fear of being called bad names. Like "bigot?"

So, my confessedly out-there-theory about why these persons are raving in our airplanes: The Jihadists have run out of black-eyed virgins? There is a shortage of supply? Thus, for the time being, as an interim bother, until the stock of black-eyed virgins can be replenished (or reconstructed and equitably distributed) the present tactic is to raise new fears — the "Frenzied Skies" method — amongst the American commercial flying public.

I have no idea at all about the black-eyed virgins of Islam. The reward for jihadist martyrs! Where they came from, how they are qualified, and that sort of stuff. It's beyond my ken.2 But, I guess to the jihadists a fundamental promise is a fundamental promise. The quid pro quo is "I'll be an enthusiastic homicide-bomber, but I expect my 72 black-eyed virgins or the deal is off."

So, unless a substantial new batch of compliant b.e.v's can be compiled, we might have to expect that berserkers running around our in-flight aircraft, hammering on cockpit doors and trying to open passenger entrances/exits will become a more common event.


1 Valkyrie: (Norse mythology) one of the maidens of Odin who chose heroes to be slain in battle and conducted them to Valhalla

2 houri [Arab.,=black-eyed], one of the beautiful maidens said by some Muslims to dwell in paradise for the enjoyment of the faithful.

© Frank Maguire


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Frank Maguire

(Frank Maguire passed away on May 19, 2021. His obituary can be read here.

Frank Maguire was born in Dorchester, MA, 1938, attended schools in Massachusetts, California, and Arizona, where he completed degrees in music and English writing/Journalism. Frank has been married to Helen Isabel Maguire Estevez of Culver City, California, since 1957. They have six children, 14 grandchildren, and 17 great-grandchildren.


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